​In addition to developing our Belingual approach as part of my work, I also volunteer to run two clubs, one in English and another on Swahili. I do this as a parent because I can see how valuable these two hours every two weeks are for my child, both in terms of language development, but also in terms of sense of belonging and identity. When we go to the clubs, my child sees that there are other families that speak different languages, that there are other children that look like them, that our diversity is a strength. Our little Swahili club helps me give my child contact with their other culture and identity. After each club, my child shows a bit more interest in the language and says that they are from Kenya with a little bit more confidence and pride. And that means the world to me.

​I can see the clubs have a similar impact on other children and other parents. For many, language clubs have become communities of connection and support. Starting a club and keeping it going is not something that happens on its own, it takes dedication and time from our volunteers. Most of our volunteers are parents of multilingual children who want to provide their child(ren) with a safe, fun space to use their home language. Their dedication makes our clubs work.   Before I became a specialist on the Belingual project, I was the coordinator, and my daily work was with our volunteers. I think one of the things that makes Familia special is that most of our volunteers come to Familia in search of community. Working with our Belingual volunteers has been really rewarding, probably because I feel like we are peers, in a way united in our experience of multilingual parenthood and whilst none of our experiences are the same, we share similar fears, frustrations, hopes and wishes for our children. For me, this project has been a process of developing approaches that for us (not them).

And finally, my greatest teachers during my work with Belingual have been the children that attend our clubs and events. There is not a single interaction that I have walked away from without a new idea or realization that something needs to be improved or worked on.  I loved the opportunity to play and have fun and to encourage parents to do the same.

eDITOR: YVETTE AHONEN

The first months my social circle consisted mostly of my partner’s family and his friends. And this is where the struggle started – in most situations, I was the only foreigner in the room. The conversation switched to Finnish quickly and I found myself talking mostly to my partner as in most of the cases I did not feel brave enough to approach the new group of people and ask them to switch to English. ​I was very welcomed in my partner’s family, but most of them are not fluent in English and I could feel that in some situations the translation was not there.

Even though I am still far from being fluent, I believe it is important to find victory in small things

But I also feel that we should address more often how mentally exhausting is the language learning process – from awkward moments when someone talks to you in Finnish, and it takes moments for you to realize that your answer is needed, to your brain thinking in 3 languages in day. When we talk about intercultural couples, we should also point out a moment of a language mixtures in a brain, when you forget a word in English, remember it in your native tongue but you need to express yourself in Finnish. For example, me and my partner spoke only English in the beginning of our relationship, which is neither mine nor his native tongue. Now I try speaking Finnish regularly and there is mixture of FinEnglish in our everyday conversations. And how much effort it takes to always think in your second language and add a third one on top!

​It has been a little bit over a year since I moved to Finland. Looking back, I see that a lot has been done and a lot of work is waiting ahead. Sometimes I still feel out of place and lonely, but then I remember what therapist once told me: “Integration is a difficult process. Only after 10 years of living in a new country I was able to say confidently that I left for good, and I have a new home. It is important to give yourself time and find things that make you feel good in a new place. It can be a new community, hobbies and even a coffee place next to your home. Find those things and stick to them during good and bad days”. This advice helps me get through the dark November evenings and wait patiently for long June days.

My advice is to be kind to yourself and give yourself enough time to go through the process of integration. Try to find new things and new communities that will support you. And ask for help when one is needed

Volunteers in collaboration with the members developed and expanded Familia. Even though there were some differences of opinion, they were resolved through discussion and flexibility. In the early stages, the Olohuone was an exciting opportunity for foreigners who wanted to meet Finns, and vice versa; many Finns wanted to join the activities because they were interested to meet foreigners and learn from other cultures. In short- people were looking for a cozy place where both Finns and foreigners can enjoy being together and learn from each other.  As Olohuone activities were expanding, so the number of members. Participants were bringing friends into the fold and this growth ensured continuity.

Children’s groups activities were made possible partly through a fund grant from the Ministry of Education and by the parents themselves. Members’ fees were 150mk per term and non-members 200mk. ​New groups were created on the initiative of members. Members were introduced to start their own language group. Soon Thai, Estonian, and Russian groups were taking shape and running. They met frequently to meet more members of their community and discuss current issues. There were some challenges too. Several language clubs wanted to organize family celebrations, and this posed a challenge in terms of space- particularly in Familia’s premises at that time (Merihaaka). There was even a request for a family celebration of at least 50 people. Familia’s premises simple did not have the capacity.

In mixed language groups, both adults and children are often of different nationalities, and it is also good for everyone to be together at the party and share experiences. Where would a foreigner get the chance to participate in an independence celebration if there was no Familia? ​Familia’s Olohuone activities included organizing yearly Christmas parties. They were very popular- couple of hundred attendees. Participants gathered early to decorate the premises together, bake what was needed, and general chores. Familia’s Christmas party was a multicultural gathering where singing, playing games, and tasting Christmas delicacies from different countries was encouraged. This brought so much joy to many families in the middle of a dark winter.

Today, Familia still organizes Olohuone activities throughout Helsinki, Espoo, and Vantaa. Multicultural families can meet and enjoy coffee, tea, and snacks together. There are new groups opening early 2024!  If you are interested in joining or want to learn more about them click here.

excerpt translated from finnish from monikultturiyhdistys familia club vuosinna 1987-1997 book and familia's archives.
edited by yvette ahonen 

Once I entered my so called “adulthood”, I faced the challenge of limited career opportunities in Vaasa. I wanted to explore somewhere else, and I made the decision to move to Helsinki because I thought there were more extensive employment options. In Helsinki I faced the complexities of navigating a predominantly Finnish-speaking environment- both working wise and daily life.

But an identity crisis in my context does not necessarily mean rejecting my Finnish identity but rather embracing the complexities of having a dual cultural and linguistic uniqueness within the country. Its reconciling my Swedish-speaking identity with the broader Finnish national identity.

Editor: yvette ahonen

Palattuani Suomeen palasin myös gradua vaille valmiisiin maisterinopintoihini. Olin suorittanut opinnot Itä-Suomen yliopiston kansainvälisessä ”Intercultural counselling & Cultural Diversity” maisterinkoulutusohjelmassa viittä vaille valmiiksi, mutta lopputyöni oli jäänyt roikkumaan. Gradussani tutkin suomalaisen puolisona maahan muuttaneiden maahanmuuttostressiä ja puolison tarjoamaa sosiaalista tukea. Samaan aikaan osallistuin Siirtolaisinstituutin järjestämään Monikulttuuriset avioliitot sillanrakentajina -seminaariin, jossa kuulin ensimmäistä kertaa Familiasta. Kun sitten vuoden 2008 alussa huomasin, että Familia etsii projektipäällikköä uuteen hankkeeseensa, tuntui se samanlaiselta ihmesattumalta kuin Amnestyn työpaikka muutama vuosi aiemmin. Tälläkin kertaa planeetat tuntuivat osuneen kohdilleen ja Familia tuntui heti omanlaiselta paikalta.

1. Ideoinut, kasvanut, kehittynyt, oppinut ja inspiroitunut. Ilokseni olen huomannut, että minun ja kollegoideni tekemä kova työ on luonut pohjan kaksikulttuurisille perheille tarkoitetun toiminnan pysyvälle rahoitukselle ja rakentanut Familian sellaiseksi millainen se tänä päivänä on

Familia-vuosieni aikana Suomessa asuvien kaksikulttuuristen perheiden määrä on kasvanut 56 000:sta lähes 90 000:een. Näissä luvuissa ovat mukana sellaiset kahden kulttuurin parit, joiden toinen puoliso on syntynyt Suomessa ja toinen ulkomailla. Lisäksi Suomessa asuu yli 10 000 sellaista kahden kulttuurin paria, joiden molemmat puolisot ovat syntyneet ulkomailla, mutta eri maissa. Samaan aikaan Familian toiminta on kasvanut ja vahvistunut, ja ammattilaisten, asiantuntijoiden ja päättäjien ymmärrys kahden kulttuurin perheiden ja suomalaisten erityispiirteistä on lisääntynyt.

Vuosien kuluessa olen ollut poissa Familiasta vähän pidempään äitiyslomalla ja opintovapaalla. Yhteisen arvomaailman lisäksi olen viihtynyt Familiassa työni monipuolisuuden vuoksi. Parhainta työssä ovat kaikki ne ihanat ihmiset, joita olen päässyt kohtamaan ja joihin olen saanut tutustua. Osasta teistä on tullut minulle rakkaita ystäviä. Familiassa ei ole kahta samanlaista työpäivää enkä ole kohdannut kahta samanlaista kahden kulttuurin paria tai perhettä. Ihan jokaiselta olen oppinut jotakin uutta.  Kulttuurinväliseen vuorovaikutukseen ja kohtaamisiin liittyy väistämättä väärinymmärryksiä ja kommelluksia, joten huumorintajusta, itsemyötätunnosta ja kyvystä nauraa itselleen on ollut sekä parisuhteessani että työssäni paljon apua. Familian käytävillä kuuluukin usein naurua monelta suunnalta!

Minulla on sanonta, että sinä voit kyllä lähteä Familiasta, mutta Familia ei lähde sinusta! Aina olen palannut takaisin niin kuin on moni muukin. Familiassa olen saanut tehdä merkityksellistä työtä itselleni tinkimättömien inhimillisten arvojen, kuten yhdenvertaisuuden, tasa-arvon sekä oikeudenmukaisuuden parissa.​

Olen itsekin asunut ulkomailla ja kokenut sen, millaista uuteen maahan ja ympäristöön sopeutuminen voi olla. Olemme puolisoni kanssa kohdanneet monia kahden kulttuurin perheille tyypillisiä iloja ja suruja. Haasteet ja vaikeudet, niin kliseiseltä kun tämä saattaa kuulostaakin, ovat hitsanneet meitä entistä tiiviimmin yhteen. Meillä on takana yhteistä kahden kulttuurin perheen arkea jo yli 20 vuotta.  ​Koen oman roolini Familiassa vähän samoin kuin olen sen kokenut parisuhteessani: Luotettavana ja turvallisena olkapäänä ja rinnalla kulkijana, uteliaana kanssaihmettelijänä ja myötätuntoisena kuuntelijana. Toivon, että olen voinut olla tätä myös työkavereilleni ja niille lukuisille kahden kulttuurin pareille ja perheille, joita olen työssäni kohdannut. Meidän oma kahden kulttuurin perhe on kovin pieni, joten meille Familia on ollut myös kuin suuri perhe.

Työni ja kohtaamani ihmiset ovat olleet voimavara ja auttaneet vaikeiden aikojen ylitse. Familia on yhteisö, jossa minä, parisuhteeni ja perheeni ovat tulleet kohdatuiksi, nähdyiksi, kuulluiksi, ymmärretyiksi ja hyväksytyiksi. Tämän kokemuksen tahtoisin välittää kaikille Familiaan tulijoille

”Kulttuurienvälisessä osaamisessa ei ole kyse ensisijaisesti toisen tuntemisesta, vaan itsensä tuntemisesta ja siitä välisyydestä - että uskaltaa ylittää rajoja, ottaa selvää, ottaa puheeksi. Että voi luoda yhteistä ymmärrystä ja yhteisiä merkityksiä."

The kitchen is the heart of the home. In addition to pinata, the art club also taught papier-mache work, handmade paper, woven work, marbled and silk-dyed eggs, stick horses and so on. There they sat tightly side by side on kitchen benches. The chatter was exhilarating as recipes were exchanged, tastes were guessed at and good advice was showered down in spades.

​Children were not only welcome at the Kitchen Club but were an integral part of its charm. Sessions often involved children- for example: pasta preparation or crafting of Karelian pies. The younger members of Familia’s community were encouraged to join their parents in the joy of creating delicious dishes. The Kitchen Club became a space for cultural exchange, where experiences were shared, and friendships were fostered.

​Cooking gave them back something of their own from their own country, and the room was full of happy, laughing people all the time, excitedly talking about things like the customs of their country, their own families and their mothers' secret recipes. They were at home, you could say.

​Most recently, Familia continued with the Kitchen Club through a collaboration with Marttaliitto/ Marthaförbundet. The group was composed of 7-10 intercultural families and the host. The aim was to have fun, practice Finnish language, learn to prepare new recipes and enhance everyday skills. ​The sessions were led by a volunteer who aimed to tackle the Finnish cooking culture to make it more familiar to the participants, or dive into some other culture and find out more about it with the group.  ​The group met regularly monthly, and up until 2020 participants met at the Helsingfors svenska Marthaförening & Tapahtuma Martha-keittiössä in Jätkäsaari. The group also organized mushroom picking trips.

There was this internal conflict. I changed during my time in Finland, and then when I went back home, I was not sure where I fit in. The cultural values and expectations I internalized in Finland sometimes clashed with those in Morocco, and suddenly I was not sure who I was in this context

I was back home, finally! But suddenly, I felt a form of “reverse homesickness”, where I longed for the familiar aspects of Finland. It has been emotionally challenging trying to cope with this yearning while trying to establish a sense of belonging again

editor: yvette ahonen

Naapurini Eeva Meloni pyysi minua mukaan syntymässa olevaan kansainvaliseen yhdistykseen. Tama kiinnosti kovasti, olihan Finnish Design Centerin toiminta ollut hyvin kansainvälistä. Familian viikoittainen taidekerho toimi aktiivisesti johdollani vuosina 1988 - 2001. Sen jälkeen toiminta jatkui Luovuuden tori Agoran yhteydessä. Kerho kokoontui viikoittain ja oli avoin kaikille, lapsille ja aikuisille. Taidekerhon toiminta oli erittäin monipuolista. Siellä… valmistettiin taide- ja käyttöesineitä papier-mâché tekniikalla kudottiin kangaspuilla poppanoita ja räsymattoja huovutettiin tehtiin pieniä ryijyjä villa- ja paperilangoista valmistetiin piñatoja, kynttilöitä, käsintehtyä paperia, keppihevosia. maalattiin puu-, lastu- kori- ja lasiesineitä jne. Vierailut eri alojen taiteilijoiden studioihin sekä design-alan yrityksiin kuuluivat myös ohjelmaan.   Olimme myös päiväretkillä mm. Porvoossa, Hollolassa, Billnäsissä, Fiskarssissa jne.

​Eri-ikäisten ja useista maista kotoisin olevien taideharrastaijen yhdessä tekeminen toi kaikille hyvän mielen sekä uusia oppeja ja ystäviä.​ Mieleenpainuvin ja kaunein muistoni taidekerhon ajoilta on, kun ompelimme Japanista kotoisin olevan Asaka Ashidan johdolla omien mittojemme mukaan leikatut kimono/yukatat. Kaikki huipentui, kun näihin pukeutuneina vietimme kotonani teeseremonian, jonka veti vierailulla ollut japanilainen teemestari. Kevätaurinko paistoi ja ulkoa kuului mustarastaan laulu.  ​Katso alla oleva kuvakokoelma!

Toimittaja: Yvette Ahonen
Teksti ja kuvat: Eeva Valkeisenmäki